Ugh. Why is the dude I love in another state? I just want to be with him. I tried to date other dudes, but it seems pointless. The one person I want to be with I can't. I hate that we live in two different states. It makes everything hard. There are a lot of things that I would love to do with him. I can't even do things couples do. And the dudes I talk to don't want to do much. They are boring. All they want to do is be lil players and shit. I am tired of trying to find someone that can come close to you. I swear I live in a fantasy world because reality is not what it seems. I have a very creative imagination. I don't even think there is even a point in trying anymore. I AM TIRED. I am tired of doing that getting to know you stage with dudes. I mean they say they want to get to know me but they actually don't.  ::Connie::